What to Wear?

I know it might sound petty, but one of the biggest pet peeves for some poker players is what other poker players are wearing.  Why?  I guess that they feel that it is an expression of who you are.  Or more importantly, who you THINK you are.

Before the “poker explosion”, not too many casual players wore sunglasses at the poker table.  I mean, why would you?  You’re playing cards indoors and most casinos have no windows whatsoever.  There’s not much sunshine in there to blind you.  It’s like wearing a raincoat in the shower.  So why do it?

Well, after the “hole cams” were installed in poker tables and televised poker became a new national pastime, many players went “Hollywood”.

They would wear sunglasses, presumably to hide any minuscule dilation of their pupils or imperceptible twitches of their eyelids when the next card came out or when an opponent made a significant bet (as if 99% of us would see that anyway).  Frankly, I firmly believe that it was to look cool for the TV cameras.

Daniel Negreanu Poking Fun at Poker Players Who Wear Sunglasses

Not to be outdone, some started to wear hoodies (hooded sweatshirts) with the hood covering their heads in addition to the sunglasses.  The “Unabomber” Phil Laak made this his trademark.  Maybe Phil has some sort of scalp spasm that he wants to conceal when he makes a good hand, I don’t know.

Phil Laak at the 2006 WSOP

Then came the headphones.  For some, the impression they present is, “I play soooo much poker (therefore I am great) and I get soooo bored with it (because I am great and most other players aren’t and therefore they bore me), I must have something to listen to to occupy my mind besides the mindless drivel spewing forth from the drooling fools sitting beside me”.

Some folks just want to listen to music when playing, which is just fine as long as you can follow the action and not slow the game down.  If you do slow down the game, it is aggravating to both the other players and the dealer.

While great for gaining attention from the TV cameras, these accessories do little for the everyday poker player, if not actually hurting him.  Most poker players I know think all of these things are pretty silly.

So if you join a game wearing dark sunglasses, a hoodie and have iPod earbuds jammed in your ears, some players will think that YOU think you’re at the final table of the WSOP every single hand.  Well, you’re not.  You are probably sitting at a low limit game where most players are there just to have a good time, drink a few cocktails and play some cards for a while.

The fact is that you will most likely be perceived as a “poser” or a “wannabe” to most other poker players.  Therefore, some will be gunning for you which is a disadvantage and it might just embarrass you.  Some might make comments about your appearance and force you into an awkward situation.  Who wants that?

Avoid this embarrassment by simply being who you are.  If you dress like a wannabe poker pro in real life, then by all means, continue to do so (and suffer the consequences).

In my humble opinion, you should just wear what you would in any other casual setting and be comfortable.  That’s an important thing – being comfortable.  That way you can focus on your game and not how cool you look with your Ray-Bans gleaming under the artificial light or if you have the coolest headphones at the table.  How you play is by far the biggest part of winning the game, not how you look.

I’m waiting for some poser to show up wearing this:

The Sold Out Poker Tournament

We had poker tournaments scheduled at certain times every day.  We started these tourneys on time every day, and players appreciated that.  If it was scheduled for 7:00PM, the clock started running at 7:00PM.  If you bought into a tournament and you were sitting there for 15 minutes waiting for it to start after it was scheduled to start, would you like that very much?  I didn’t think so.

We started a tournament one day and two players came in 20 minutes or so after it started.

One of them said, “We want to buy in to the tournament.”

I told them, “I’m sorry guys, the tournament is sold out.”

“Sold out?” he asked.

I replied, “Yes, all of the seats have been sold.”

His was disgusted and said, “Sold out…I’ve never heard of that!”

I explained that the tourney started 20 minutes ago and all of the seats have been sold.

He was insistent that I should find a way to get him and his friend into this tournament.  I had to tell him that he was too late, the tourney started 20 minutes ago, and that it was sold out.

He then walked off telling his friend how we had terrible customer service.

I just looked at the other Floorman and said, “WTF?”

The Short Game

A player came into the poker room one night and asked for a seat.  I had one open and he got chips.  Then I escorted him to the open seat and said “Here you go sir, good luck.”

The player said, “I don’t want this seat.  This is a shorthanded game and I don’t like playing shorthanded.”

I replied, “This game is 9 handed, sir.  You will make it a FULL game.”

The player insisted, “I said I don’t want a shorthanded game.  Put me on the list.”

I just said, “OK” but thought “WTF?”

The First Entry for the WTF Files!

The WTF Files are a collection of off-the-wall or funny stories from the Poker Room Floor.

There’s No Meat in This Soup!
In one poker room I worked at we offered free soup and chili to the players, in addition to snack mix and goldfish crackers.  There were big pots of the stuff and you could just help yourself, and it was damn good too.  The soup and chili were made by hand in-house, not poured from a can.  Each pot was labeled so you knew what it was.  No other room in town offered this kind of thing to their players.

Well, one night I was working the podium and a “gentleman” walked up with a bowl of soup in his hand.  He appeared agitated and said in a nasty tone, “Hey man, there’s no meat in this soup!”

I was a little taken back and calmly said, “That’s because it’s…tomato soup, sir.”

His response was, “That’s bullsh*t.” and then he walked off mumbling something to himself.

I just stood there thinking “WTF?”

Ask the Poker Room Floorman

Please feel free to ask me any poker room questions you have.